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Romo Retiring Is a Good Thing, MLB Predictions, MVP blah blah blah, POPSICLE BIKE and more: Your Update for April 6.

TONY NO MO

Tony Romo said no mo(re) football and is taking his talents to CBS, thus ending his illustrious(?) career in the NFL.

The good news is that the Texans didn’t do anything foolish and send a bunch of assets to the Cowboys in exchange for a guy who retires, thus causing them to be with out said assets AND a QB. What I’m saying is, at least give Rick Smith a tad bit of credit for that.

The better news about Romo retiring is that we no longer have to listen to Phil Simms call the game of the week for CBS. Instead, Tony will be working with Jim Nantz and Tracy Wolfson calling CBS’ marquee match-up each week.

Obviously Tony will be able to provide outstanding insight into today’s offensive heavy NFL because of his recent NFL experience. But he’ll also be able to give keen insight when it comes to teams getting bounced from the playoffs (hi Texans) early, also thanks to his recent NFL experience.

As an added bonus to each broadcast, Romo will also be able to deep dive into on the field injuries as they happen, thanks to his…you get the idea.

Here’s a prediction of how the first exchange will go between Nantz and Romo:

Jim Nantz: “Looks like Luck didn’t see the blitz there and was hit from behind. He’s lucky he held on to the ball because that was a massive shot by JJ Watt. Tony, what would you have done there?”

Tony Romo: “Well, I’d of probably got hurt and missed the rest of the season, Jim.”

Jim Nantz: “Probably?”

Jim and Tony share a good laugh.

(Scene)

Speaking of predictions…

MLB PREDICTIONS

I was going to do a decent MLB preview but I figured it’d bore you guys and gals to death, so instead here are my down and dirty predictions for the 2017 MLB Season:

DIVISION WINNERS:
AL Central – Indians
AL East – Red Sox
AL West – Astros (AJ Hinch wins manager of the year)
AL Wild Card 1 – Blue Jays
AL Wild Card 2 – Orioles

NL Central – Cubs
NL East – Nationals
NL West – Dodgers
NL Wild Card 1 – Mets
NL Wild Card 2 – Rockies (Bud Black wins manager of the year)

WORLD SERIES:
Red Sox defeat the Dodgers in 6

CY YOUNG:
AL: Sale (BOS)
NL: Kershaw (LAD)

MVP:
AL: Altuve (HOU)
NL: Arinado (COL)

Speaking of MVP talk… (BAM! ANOTHER SMOOTH ASS TRANSITION BY YOURS TRULY)

MVP TALK (Makes Vomiting Preferred)

The winner is the fans…when this goes away. Until then read this post from Lamont, he makes some good points. I dig the fresh angle he takes talking about JJ (Watt) and AA (ron) (yeah, I just made that a thing).

At this point, I kind of hope neither of them win it; that would be hilarious.

My opinion? Harden is your MVP. Reason? Better record.

If you disagree with me, that’s fine, feel free to leave me a comment below so that I can totally ignore it.

MORE SPORTS AND STUFF…

– Here are 2 examples of people looking dumb on game shows. One on Jeopardy and one on Wheel of Fortune. The first one I kind of understand, but the second one?

What the actual hell lady?

WTF IS A POPSICLE BIKE?

I’d divorce her right there on the spot. No way am I staying married to a woman who’s stupidity just cost me a $1000 toss up puzzle. Nope, she can hop her stupid ass on her popsicle bike and just ride on off without me.

– Stephen Piscotty got hit 3 teams in ONE TRIP around the bases. More like PISSEDCotty AMIRITE??? HEYOOOOO!

– Worst. Boss. Ever. A lady who was hanging by one hand from a 7th story window –  WHILE HER ASSHOLE BOSS VIDEOED IT – eventually fell. Go watch it here.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“POPSICLE BIKE!” – An idiot.

HOTTIE OF THE DAY

Vanna-White

Talking Wheel Of Fortune reminded me that Vanna White was once in Playboy, so I Googled that shit!

 

About Barry Laminack (33 Articles)
Talented, funny, handsome, creative, fun to be around, well endowed, great body,smart, liar.

2 Comments on Romo Retiring Is a Good Thing, MLB Predictions, MVP blah blah blah, POPSICLE BIKE and more: Your Update for April 6.

  1. Got your AL Central and West Division mixed up.

    Liked by 1 person

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