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Draft Day Bingo, The Texans Will Draft…, Leslie Alexander owes the NBA $100k, and more. Here’s your April 27 Draft Day update


Happy NFL draft day everyone!

Before I break down what I think the Texans will do, here is a link to an NFL draft buzzword bingo card I put together a few years ago. It includes squares like “…in space” “high motor” and “it factor.”

Every time somebody on your TV says one of these words you drink a shot and punch yourself in the face. Use the shot glasses as your markers. Enjoy!


Ok, now I know the question on everyone’s mind is who are the Texans going to draft in the first round. Well, I’m here to answer that for you. But before I do, first let me say this is all educated speculation. If one of the three teams I think will draft a QB don’t, then I wrote all of this for nothing.

Now, lets eliminate some positions using logic and numbers.

We’ll start with QB.

There are three teams that need a quarterback that are drafting ahead of the Texans, those being the Browns, Jets and Cardinals (I’ve also seen a mock draft that says the Bills are in the market for a QB, but I think they’ll go WR or CB). The smart money is that at least two of these teams draft a QB. I happen to think all three of them will; hear me out. The Browns have two picks and will snag Miles Garret at 1 and a QB at 12. Because of this, the Jets will actually get first pick from this years QB crop. That leaves the wild card, Arizona Cardinals. Along with QB, the Cardinals also need help at cornerback and linebacker. This is a deep draft for cornerbacks, so that can wait until the second round. There is only one linebacker worthy of a top 15 pick (Ruben Foster), but I think the Saints will snatch him up at 11. That leaves the Cardinals taking whoever is left of Mitchell Trubisky, Deshaun Watson, and Patrick Mahomes (and yes, I put those in the order I think they will be drafted).
Note to Texans: Please don’t reach and draft DeShone Kizer here.

Next, lets look at offensive tackle.

This is a really thin position in this years draft. So much so, there is really only one clear first round OT and that is Ryan Ramczyk. There are no less than eight teams who could be in the market for a tackle (Chargers, Panthers, Bengals, Ravens, Buccaneers, Broncos, Dolphins and Giants), so the likelihood of Ramczyk (and even a second OT that probably should be going in round 2 like Cam Robinson, Garett Bolles, or Roderick Johnson) lasting until the 25th pick is slim.

What about Cornerback?

Well they could go cornerback, but they still have three serviceable guys at that position, plus like we have already established, this is a very deep cornerback draft (there are between 9 and 12 in the top 50, depending on who’s scouting you believe). So the Texans could wait until round 2 or 3 for this.

That brings us to Safety (sort of)

First of all, it’s a position of need since Q-Demps left and has been for many years now. And much like this year’s cornerback class, this years safety class is also very deep. In fact, Texans GM Rick Smith is on record as saying this is one of the strongest safety classes that he can remember.

Can you say context clue?

So all of the above leads me to think that the Texans will draft a safety with the 25th pick. Now the question is, who?

Well, there are a few teams that have safety on their short list of needs but some of them -like the Browns and Bills – we’ve already covered.

Then there are the Titans and Chargers.

Most mock drafts I’ve seen have the Titans taking a Safety (or CB) at 5 and the Chargers taking a Safety (or DL) at 7. So if the top 2 safeties (Jamal Adams and Malik Hooker) are off the board then that leaves the Texans drafting…drum roll please…Obi Melifonwu (Connecticut)!!!!

920x920Here’s what Melifonwu did at the combine:

Height: 6′ 4″
Weight: 224

40 time: 4.40
Bench press: 17 reps
Vert. jump: 44.0 inches
Broad Jump: 141.0 inches

OVERALL GRADE: 5.72 (5.50-5.99 grades as a “Chance to become NFL starter”)

Here’s what Walter Football had to say about Melifonwu (and when you read the 2nd paragraph you’ll further see why it makes sense for the Texans to draft him):

“Every year, there are some size/speed freaks who rise up draft boards, and Melifonwu is one of those prospects for the 2017 NFL Draft. He has great size and also is a fast defender. Melifonwu was superb at the Senior Bowl as he showed real coverage skills in the passing game and looked good being the deep free safety. He is not tight and has the ability to contribute in man coverage while also having the size to be the eighth man in the tackle box. Melifonwu created a real buzz and could go off the board late in the first round.

Some teams think Melifonwu can play cornerback, and some even had him work outs at cornerback. They feel Melifonwu is a great option to defend big receivers like Mike Evans and Kelvin Benjamin because Melifonwu is as big as they are but is faster and more athletic. He has the size and strength to be the eight man in the box with the speed and ball skills to be a deep free safety. He also can play man coverage on tight ends. Thus because of his size, speed and athleticism, teams view Melifonwu as a mismatch neutralizer. “


– Leslie Alexander went HAM on NBA referee Bill Kennedy during a game, and it cost him some bread. Damn, now I’m hungry.

– See, why can’t we have the rally cellphone light like they do in Frisco? But nooooo, instead we’re stuck with a bunch of WOOO’ing idiots.

– Tom Herman isn’t playing around and pretty much just put the rest of the Big 12 on notice with this.

– Man Arrested Trying To “Save” His Beer in a fire. I mean, duh.

– If you’re not watching Brockmire, you are dumb. It’s a great show. Jerome Solomon turned me on to it and I’m glad he did.

QUOTE OF THE DAY (from the 2011 draft)

“And Christian Ponder’s stock has SOARED. I said first rounder earlier today… but I meant his girlfriend.”

– Ian Rapoport



I tried to find a picture of a “hot” UConn Husky chic. Not husky like…never mind. My point is, it was harder than one might think to find a pic of a hot UConn chick by herself. [Insert joke here about Huskies always traveling in packs]

About Barry Laminack (45 Articles)
Talented, funny, handsome, creative, fun to be around, well endowed, great body,smart, liar.

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