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Drunken weekends, sports, more drinking, Astros, tweaking Texans fan, shame bells and more: The awesome update for May 31

By HOLLY XO

Every weekend is a holiday weekend for Holly…

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I’ve come to conclusion I’ve found my calling in life. I’m extremely good at tanning and shot gunning wake me ups. (In case you’re not from Galveston, it’s a Red Bull mixed with about 6 different liquors). I’d update you on my weekend but I don’t remember much, per usual. I suppose Tiger and I were in the same boat… err… car?

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Let’s get sportsy…

A lot has happened since last Wednesday…
More NFL players getting arrested (What are the odds it’s a Dallas Cowgirl player? We should petition to change the blue and silver to orange). I’ve decided that Dallas is like the ITT Tech of colleges. It’s where you go when you know you’ve screwed up in life. They offer you a second chance at turning your life around… Or just pay you to continue to shame the organization, either way the star continues to shine bright in Jerry’s world. That’s right boys, wear that star proudly! Single file now!

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Rookies have re activated their social media accounts due to the high demand of Memorial weekend “bottle popping” to show us how they’re spending their signing bonuses in Vegas. (tsk tsk boys).

And the best yet… 89% of my Facebook friends debuted their kid’s 3rd grade graduation pictures. (While I’m at home eating cold pizza, sipping beer and still swiping left on dating apps).
Oh, and a pretty cool MLB fight that I can’t help but laugh and watch over and over again.
Hitting, no NFL: The boys are back. Our Astros are back on their groove. 11 runs in an inning earlier this week? I know what you’re thinking… Never trust a Houston sports team, we’re due for a letdown… but it’s really hard NOT to believe in these guys.

Meanwhile, somewhere in the heart of Houston…

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It’s that awkward time of the year when I’m reaching for sports so I suppose we can just skip right into shame bells…

I don’t know about you guys but I am SO sick of Lonzo and LaVar… 5 minutes of fame? These guys are begging for 5 years of fame. Here ya go boys, here’s your attention from me…

Lonzo refuses to work out with the Celtics… Ungrateful little sh–.  I hope no team drafts him and his creeper dad.

Shame bell No. 1

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Lonzo allows his father to control more future shoe contracts… I’m pretty sure if we keep reading it will also show us how his dad even wipes his own ass for him…

Shame bell No. 2

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LaVar Ball was born…  And for the record LAVAR, your wikipedia bores the hell out of me.

Shame bell No. 3

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PS- (Can you even “PS” on a website?) If you guys haven’t had a chance yet to tune into Beth’s show Saturday nights on ESPN 97.5 , you’re missing out! I linked the podcast for you in case you forget to tune in this week at 10 p.m. I’ll be stopping by and looking forward to hearing from you guys! You can also check out her sexy store Darling Way and purchase some fun for you and your honey!

 

Quote of the Day:

“Stay in your lane.” – Some pig

Hottie of the Day:

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….Because we have to stay in our lane, huh? 

 

About Holly (21 Articles)
Football guru/Professional MNF shit talker Welcome to Holly's world🏈💋 #FlyEaglesFly 🦅 Instagram this @hollysworldxo

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