By HOLLY XO
Pretty sure I’m diabetic after this weekend. I had this genius idea to attempt to stay sober. Good news and bad news. Good news- I stayed sober. Bad news- I ate. A lot.
My Sunday menu consisted of:
-a kolache & chocolate covered donut holes (I’m assuming the quantity was equivalent to 3 whole donuts)
-3 slices of pizza (with extra ranch of course, because I AM from the south)
-an oatmeal raisin cookie the size of my face
(By now I’m literally holding my stomach in pain praying I don’t explode from over eating)
-a plate of BBQ because my aunt insisted that I need to eat
-a pint of ice cream (who can only take a few bites? Not I)
-a bowl of fruit (I’m a firm believer that we all need balance in our lives)
*Cue food coma*
Speaking of food… this picture was taken hours prior to the birth of my food baby.
I had a blast talking dating, sex with drones & locker rooms with Beth and Del. In case you missed Saturday’s episode… Love & Laughter with Beth will definitely keep you entertained late night!
Grocery stores: Yes, produce. Produce me a man? This is my new spot to search for potential dating candidates. I’ll be conducting another study from multiple locations around the Galveston county area. I’ll make sure to keep you guys updated.
Onto the sports!
Our Houston Astros: Are all that really matter right now. 11 straight?! Hey Yankees, here’s a good ol southern “bless your heart” better known as… “EFF you.” Our ‘Stros deserve all the attention & praise right now. Per usual, another great piece by Chris on our Crush City guys here.
NBblah blah BLAH: You guys really thought this series would be fun, huh? Personally I think it’s a waste of a bar tab and the few brain cells I have left.
This series brings me to our first shame bell…
Lebron James. (Side note: he’s always been a little B—- in my eyes) I know losing sucks… and having to live in Cleveland also sucks… but being a certified douche in interviews because YOU had an issue with the podium is ridiculous.
Shame bell No. 1
My man crush decided to venture out on his own this weekend without asking for my permission. Now now Rex Ryan, look what you’ve done…
Shame bell No. 2
Yesterday marks exactly one month until my other man crush (George W Bush) celebrates his 71st birthday…
*insert inappropriate sexual thoughts / comments here*
Shame bell No. 3
Quote of the Day:
“You know what I like.” -Rex Ryan (Any guesses?)
Hottie the Day:
This will be me conducting my grocery store dating project… only with way more food in the buggy…