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Is feeding your children snacks coddling? I say no. Also, the Home Run Derby, more bones in a house, and Baby Biscuit tried to kill me. The Update for July 11th.

Last night the rookie Aaron Judge proved why he’s the likely MVP of Major League Baseball by absolutely crushing the Home Run Derby. After Justin Bour hit an incredible 22 homers in the first round, Judge stepped up to the plate and hit just enough to advance to the next round. 23 home runs in a single round is third most after Josh Hamilton’s 28 home run round in 2008 and Bobby Abreu and Giancarlo Stanton hit 24 in 2005 and 2016 respectively. Here are the top 5 leaders for most home runs in a single derby:

  • Giancarlo Stanton (2016) – 61
  • Aaron Judge (2017) – 47
  • Todd Frazier (2015) – 42
  • Bobby Abreu (2005) – 41
  • Joc Pederson & Todd Frazier (2015) – 39

The All-Star game is tonight, and with six Astros on the roster, it’s worth watching for Houston fans. This is the first year since 2003 that the All Star winning league will not get home field advantage for the World Series. I’m torn on this one. On one hand, I really liked that the MLB All Star game actually meant something. The NBA All Star game and the Pro Bowl are borderline unwatchable because no one cares. It’s a glorified awards show – which is fine. But just make it an awards show, don’t trot people out there so JJ Watt can easily get a sack then mime surfing (you know he practiced this no less than 100 times).

JJ surfing

Also, selfishly, the Astros don’t necessarily need home-field advantage to be amazing. They have nine more runs on the road than the San Diego Padres have all season. The tweet below was posted when the Astros were beating the Blue Jays 9-0:

On the other hand, it doesn’t seem appropriate for the team with the best record not to have home field advantage, so I can understand why fan bases with strong advantages would be vexed. At any rate it’s the end of an interesting era.

During the dog days of summer, we always get the best stories. Like this one, where a writer for the Detroit Free Press laments the ritual of giving out snacks and juice boxes during half time and at the end of little league games. Read the story. I’ll wait. *do do do do do do do* Ok, we’re all back? Dear Lord. I had to read this about five times because I was certain this guy was just doing a masterful troll job at people who get bent out of shape over participation trophies. But no! He’s serious! Imagine being such a complete asshole with so little regard for fun, such a kill joy, that you honestly believe handing out snacks to children after a sporting event is what’s wrong with society. I personally don’t mind the participation trophy, honestly. I agree with Kobe’s anecdote at the beginning of the article. If you have a kid who really cares about winning, then they can use the fourth place or participation trophy as motivation to do better next time. If your kid doesn’t care, it’s a tool to say “hey, see what happened when you really didn’t like baseball. But you grinded it out, you showed up every day, and you got through it. I’m not going to make you sign up again, but this is the reward for not giving up”. But to attack the snacks of all things. I played a lot of sports growing up, and even though I loved playing soccer, or softball, or swimming, the best part of the game was half time when I got the oranges, and after the game when I got the Famous Amos cookies or the Nutter Butters. Why? Because I was a child. And children love snacks.

This is a direct quote from the article:

“This is the real source of entitlement. This is what’s making us soft.

Not participation trophies. Or fourth-place ribbons. At least those speak to effort and competitive risk. At least those serve as a symbol of losing, which, as Bryant stated, can be turned into a call for determination.

But juice boxes?

Come on. It’s a tool for coddling.”

I feel so bad for this dude’s kids. They wake up in their suburban beds, get dressed for the baseball game, all the while thinking “I wonder who’s turn it is to bring snacks? I hope it’s Tommy’s dad – he always brings several varieties which is helpful with my peanut allergy. Or maybe it’s Cindy’s mom – she brings Oreos, my favorite. Oh my God it’s my dad. He’s going to bring 15 bananas and those small bottles of water that only succeed in somehow making everyone thirstier. When the parents and kids ask where the rest of the snacks are he’s going to tell them they’re just a tool for coddling, and that’s what’s wrong with kids these days. Guess it’s another night of having my house toilet papered and my yard forked.”

Alsomore bones were found in another Houston home this week, creepy! Read our weekly Astros wrap up.

Lastly, A PSA: never leave the keys in a beach golf cart with your six year old loose. I like to think of baby biscuit as a smart child, but even she has her moments. On the fourth of July we accompanied some friends to the beach. They have a golf cart and my friend left the keys in the ignition so she wouldn’t lose them. Well, baby biscuit decided to be super helpful and turn the golf cart on since one of our party was getting ready to ride it back to the house. Well, her foot was on the acceleration pedal when she turned it on. I happened to be laying out directly in front of the golf cart. I heard a scream and turned around just in time to get completely trucked by a child in a golf cart. Have you ever hit a deer? You know how they get rolled up under your car and then come out flailing on the other side? Yeah, that was me. We got really lucky – I didn’t break anything, only had bumps, bruises, and scratches. Baby biscuit, however, was completely distraught – thinking she’d really hurt me. Then some busy body on the beach called 911 even though I was completely fine and up walking around so the police showed up, causing BB to think she was in huge trouble. The silver lining – I don’t think she’ll go near anything with four wheels for a very very long time. And I get to hold this over her head for eternity, which I’ve obviously already started doing.

Quote of the Day:

“Did your dad put you up to this?” – me after my six year old tried to kill me with a piece of heavy machinery meant for an adult.

Hottie of the Day:

hotmom

It feels weird googling “hot mom” but this lady is in her 40s! What’s her secret!?

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