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Hey chron.com, thanks for nothing; Rockets, a Barstool battle, Rick and Morty, Johnny (Canadian) Football, gambling plays and more: The update for Dec. 29

By FRED FAOUR

So I felt like writing an update today because…well, I can. Make sure you check out sportsmap.com later for a column on why the Texans should consider trading Jadeveon Clowney.

So you might have heard us on The Blitz discussing this article on chron.com. (You don’t need to click on it. It is a ridiculous, 128 photo slide show). Some moron decided to put faces to the names of 128 radio people in Houston. Guess who did not make the cut? Either myself or A.J. Hoffman. (Or Charlie Pallilo or Sean Salisbury, for that matter). Mind you, I am going on what I was told. I have not looked. How pathetic do you have to be to click through 128 slides?

Bitter? Angry? Not really. In all honesty, it does not bother me at all. It’s kind of funny, actually. Do you get mad at a guy with no arms for not being able to throw a curve ball? Of course not. So no reason to get angry at remedial writer.

Some other random thoughts:

  1. I really don’t want my picture out there. I do radio for a reason. The only possible point in having my photo is to print it out, blow it up and scare off little kids.
  2. Slide shows are the devil. Plain and simple. They inflate numbers to defraud advertisers. That’s why you will never see them here.
  3. It’s sad to see what chron.com has become. A clickbait, slideshow infested mess. Shame bells all around.

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Whoops: The Rockets blew a 26-point lead and lost their fourth in a row last night. Is it time to panic? Absolutely not. They simply need to get healthy.

Stay in your lane: Some “model” I have never heard of decided to get upset over a tweet made by a Barstool guy. Hilarity ensued. Dude was making a joke. This woman has nudes of herself all over the Internet. You better have a sense of humor if you are going to do stuff like that. Of course, she ejected on the conversation.

Quick TV update: If you aren’t on Rick and Morty, you are missing out on life. Maybe the most clever show on TV. Season 1 — good. Season 2 — great. Season 3 — off the charts…Jean Claude Van Johnson is worth a binge if you liked any 80s Jean Claude Van Damme movies. It’s as silly as the title sounds.

Here’s Johnny! Johnny Manziel has been cleared to sign with the Hamilton Tiger Cats of the CFL. If he can avoid an off-field meltdown (what are the odds? 8 percent) his skills should translate very well to the league. Will be fun to watch, at least until he does something stupid. More on this from me here.

Some gamblin’: It has been a rough year for Team Falcon, but a nice little run here in December has put us in the black for 2017 after being way down most of football season. We’ll ride things out this weekend with the Colts against the Texans (anything under a touchdown) and the over in Memphis-Iowa State. Memphis overs have been the key to our late season rally; might as well ride one more.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“Listen, Morty, I hate to break it to you but what people call “love” is just a chemical reaction that compels animals to breed. It hits hard, Morty, then it slowly fades, leaving you stranded in a failing marriage. I did it. Your parents are gonna do it. Break the cycle, Morty. Rise above. Focus on science.”

— Rick Sanchez from Rick and Morty

HOTTIE OF THE DAY

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Hot? Yes. But a complete lack of sense of humor makes Lindsay Pelas a 3 in my book. Fortunately she does not have to speak in a photo.

 

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