Happy New Year! I can’t believe it’s 2018. This year I’ll be turning 30 *grabs sides of face like McCauley Culkin in Home Alone*. I’ve decided that because I’m hitting a milestone age this year, I won’t be making an actual resolution. In 2017, my only resolution was to yell at Baby Biscuit less, and I think I did a good job. I’m setting some New Years Resolutions for some other people though:
Josh Innes from 790 – your New Years Resolution should be to focus on what you can do to make people listen to your station and not how you can exploit the twitter ratio for more clicks. For those of you that missed the Houston sports talk drama on New Years Eve, Innes tweeted that he thought it was abysmal that Rick Smith and the Texans are using Rick’s wife as a “prop” and an “excuse” for his firing. I wasn’t shocked to read this, Innes is a wanna be shock jock who would do and say anything for ratings on a radio station that frankly, I’m shocked still exists. People are furious. It’s weird, because I used to like Josh – even when he was in Philly after he got fired from the radio there I watched his Facebook Live show he did and found it entertaining and funny. But ever since he got back to Houston, he’s clearly been told to be as outrageous as possible and I’m not here for that sort of thing. I think John Granato summed it up really nicely here, that’s the kind of stuff you simply have the tact not to say.
The Texans – your New Years Resolution should be to actually hire a new GM now that Rick is taking a leave of absence. Do NOT under any circumstances give Bill O’Brien more power. Look at this thread from Jerome Solomon of the Houston Chronicle if you need clarity as to why. Texans fans are a vortex of hell. On one hand I want Bill O’Brien to be the coach for another year, I don’t like moving on from someone after only four years. On the other hand, I DON’T want him having more personnel decisions then he has now. This is a man who started Tom Savage over Deshaun Watson, lest we forget.
The Rockets – Your New Years Resolution will be to find a way to win without Paul and Harden, and do it quickly. After winning 14 straight games, Chris Paul was injured and they lost five games in a row before finally beating the Knicks on New Years Eve. Now James Harden has an injured hamstring and is out for at least two weeks. Chris Paul is back, but they don’t have their star and leading scorer. Losing a player who can score 50 points every game, but they’ll have to find another player to produce some points.
The Houston Astros – Your New Years Resolution is nothing. Win the World Series again, that’d be cool. Everything else is perfect. Love you guys.
Donald Trump – Your New Years Resolution should be to tweet more. You all heard me! I love the Donald’s tweets. The people in the replies are hilarious. They spend their days telling Trump he’s a piece of shit, or their hero – depends on their handle. The rest of the time they’re angrily accusing each other of being bots and posting crudely made memes. It’s a nice distraction from our real world problems. But also your New Years resolution is to just be a better person. Please for the sake of our country. Actually yeah, you maybe should take a break from Twitter.
Quote of the Day:
“My New Years resolution is to stop lying to myself about making lifestyle changes”
Hottie of the Day: