I don’t do New Year resolutions because by mid January I’d crown myself loser of all inner goals. I’m not going to stop drinking, cursing, cheating on calculus exams or stop binge eating powdered donuts at 4 a.m. in a drunken half coma. But if you think you can, Holly supports you and your stupidity.
Per usual, there are no highlights in my life from 2017 so let’s get back to sports.
What did we learn from the last 17 weeks of football ?
Tom Brady is never going to retire (side eye)
The Browns will waste AND ruin the lives of the 1st AND 4th pick (RIP young talent…)
Carson Wentz is the new era. And. My backup QB for the Eagles can’t throw for more than -2 yards a play (but we’re still going to SB so suck it)
The NYG locker room can not cat fight and win games
The Pittsburgh Steelers locker room can
Baltimore and Detroit are still the 2 teams that no one knows anything about
The Chargers have successfully advanced to a 4.5 line versus the 2.5 line that every gambler hated Rivers for in 2016
Dak either hit his sophomore slump or he’s really just not that good. Either way, yet another year further from 1995 for “dem boyz”
Goff, however, is good. And so is the entire Rams roster. (Just not good enough to beat Wentz *evil grin*)
The Bills are the luckiest team in the league… and still hold down the award for the most cool drunk fans ever.
It’s impossible for Jason Garrett to get fired
What IS possible? The Texans to have a record other than 9-7
Before I leave you…
Paris Hilton’s dog has a nicer house than me. 2018 house goals.
Shame bell No. 1
Taking selfies to the extreme? This cafe begs to differ. I need to check this place out.
Shame bell No. 2
More selfie fun. This one sounds more Holly-ish.
Shame bell No. 3
Hottie of the Day:
..No matter what year we’re in, Cassie is always fire..